Does She Like Me?
Reader matter:
I was buddies with this particular lady for a time. She dumped the woman boyfriend. We’ve been texting a large amount â like 200 communications per week. I hold getting blended signals from her, and I enjoy the girl. Should I go for it? But Really don’t wanna ruin the relationship often. We also hang out, and I also think she searches for myself for the places.
-Ivan S. Bently (Kansas)
Professional’s Answer:
Hi, Ivan. Thank you for trusting us using this vital individual issue.
There are a great number of possibilities to spell out what’s going on right here, but allow me to present my “take.” First and foremost, you state she’s delivering mixed indicators, which most likely implies she is confused and not sure of precisely what she wishes.
She could continue to have feelings or dreams your connection she just kept, or she could be waiting for you to make a step. She can still take the healing process, and she may possibly not be prepared be viewed publicly with another man yet.
Texting may be her method of communicating and linking right now while she finishes psychologically disconnecting from her ex. She can be puzzled if her relationship for you sometimes looks loves it really is developing into one thing bigger, but she’s unclear in the event that you “like” like this lady.
As for you, Ivan, you are in a really precarious area immediately. She’s regarding rebound and requires emotional service. She trusts you and feels better whenever she shares some texts or hangs around along with you. She looks for you inside halls because she loves you, in one method or some other, and that is where you need to be careful. Should you place the friendship initial above the desire for dating this lady as a girlfriend, you’re in serious risk of being relegated towards “friend area,” and is a challenging location to getting away from.
My personal information to you personally is to find combined with her and talk in person. It ought to be earlier in the day and quicker than a proper go out, it will give you a notion if she desires view you or not. Tell their she has to get-out and take an hour to laugh and savor herself while would really like the opportunity to consult with the girl in a bit more degree, as well. Pick a spot in which your friends never ever go â perhaps a Starbucks across town â so she’ll feel as if the woman confidentiality will be safeguarded.
Ask her how she is doing assuming this woman is undoubtedly done together with her ex. Shell out extremely attention to the woman body language. Is actually she bending towards you or away? Is actually she big-eyed and smiling, or detached and careful? Is actually she operating “girly” or like a buddy?
There’s one more thing you should do: Tell the girl in a very matter-of-fact method in which you prefer the girl. Subsequently you shouldn’t state another word. This lady has become the following a person to speak. Take a look this lady squarely within the sight so she can see your strength and your sincerity. Boldly and with confidence understand the woman shoulder or arms. Just make sure she knows you are considering the woman in a romantic man-woman style of method.
Be powerful and kind but never emotional or eager. Make the lady wanna come your way when it comes down to caring and comfortable man you are and never for all the nice guy who is “safe” and benign. The woman genuine thoughts and motives should reveal by themselves while the talk unfolds.
Go for it,
Nick